ZookeeperTales: Not gonna do it. Nope. Nu-uh. No way.

[elionwyr]

As well as working in the mini zoo, I also worked in our butterfly exhibit for a few years. It was a unique exhibit in that everything about it was, well, unnatural - located inside, all of our 'sunlight' came from huge bucket-shaped lights, our plants were imported from warmer climates, and our butterflies were all purchases as pupae from suppliers in varied rainforests.

We included some other critters in the exhibit. A tank of poison dart frogs were popular non-insect tenants, with one frog frequently filling the air with his plaintive, "Is there a beautiful amphibian love for me out there somewhere beyond the confines of this cage?" Another tank held an impressive dark red emperor scorpion that inspired the frequently-asked question, "If it stings you, would it hurt?"

"Yup."

"Have you ever let it sting you?"

"Nope."

"What would it feel like?"

"I'm told it feels like someone shoving a pencil through your hand."

"...Oh."

Back in our office, there was, for a while, a relatively small tank that contained a black widow.

Or so I hoped.

One day, the boss called. "Hey, do me a favour?"

"Sure - what's up?"

"Do you see the black widow?"

"Um. Excuse me?"

"Do you see her in her cage?"

"Is this a trick question?"

"Seriously. Take a look."

I looked. "Actually...no, I don't."

"Ok. I haven't seen her for a few days. So just..keep an eye out for her, ok?"

I realized he wasn't joking. "Kay. I quit."

"What?"

"There is no WAY I'm gonna poke around this office looking for a black widow!!"

"Ok, ok. Don't look for her. That's not really what I want you to do. Just - don't panic."

"GAH!!!"

(As I write this, I *think* she did eventually wind up being spotted curled up something tiny in her cage. Still? Not such a good moment.)

Lesson learned: Venom? No sir don't like it.


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Comments

[chris-walsh.livejournal.com]

You wouldn't like the super villain Venom either...

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

Noooooooooooo.