Audience Participation: What's your strangest 'real reason' for being late for work?

[elionwyr]

In this post I confessed to being late because my cat wouldn't let me sleep. This inspired the following story-sharing over on Facebook..snippets follow:

~~~
Rick Davis
A guy I worked with in the Air Force once told me that he used "The clock was running, but the hands weren't moving!"

My "really happened" excuse was the garbage truck blocking my drive for 15 minutes.

Deanna Roberts-Morton
My really happend excuse was that I almost hit a toilet on the toll road. Seriously. One fell off a truck.

Tess Kissinger
My really happened excuse was that my puppy got it's head stuck in the rim of a spare tire in my garage
~~~

So, Gentle Readers..what's YOUR best "really happened excuse"? Inquiring minds wanna know. I wanna know!

Comments

[hughcasey.livejournal.com]

I was driving behind a truck carrying recently used porta-pottys, when they fell off.

It was not pretty, I tell you.

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

..Wow.

[zhent.livejournal.com]

"sorry I'm late, my back went out while I was reaching for my wallet at the ATM. Oh, and I'm going to need to leave early too."

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. And the response was..?

[zhent.livejournal.com]

well... My boss looked at me, saw that I couldn't stand up straight and was having trouble staying upright at all, and told me to go home.

I told her that I had already made an appointment at the first available doctor without having to go to the ER, and that I would be calling my clients before I left.

She was shocked, but I was already in the office, and my plan allowed me to do the least amount of driving and still actually do work during my work day.

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

I don't know you well, but this story doesn't surprise me at all somehow.

[zhent.livejournal.com]

that was when the things I did for my clients no longer surprised my boss. It was a Friday and I was limping back into the office on Monday.

[ioianthe.livejournal.com]

There was a squirrel in my car and I could not leave until it got out. One hour late, sitting on the curb with all 4 doors open waiting for the silly thing to gtfo!

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

Awesome!

(If it could have reached the gas pedal, you'd have been in SO much more trouble..!)

[e-scapism101.livejournal.com]

I stopped to help a Golden Retriever that had just been hit by a car.

(Dog was fine, other than a broken leg.)

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

Poor baby! Could you find the owners..?

[e-scapism101.livejournal.com]

His owner showed up right after he got hit - the dog had escaped the yard. Owner carried him to the car to take him to the vet, and I went on to work.

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

Yeep!
Someone I was dating hit a dog in a similar situation. It was horrible. The dog seemed ok, but I really urged the owners to take him to a vet anyway..

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

I couldn't get out of my apartment, because the landlords had freshly painted both staircases that lead to my floor.

(Certainly not the most interesting honest excuse I've ever had, though. That one involved also trying to explain the rug burns on my knees.)

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

That's awesome!

..Rug burns, eh? *raises eyebrow*

One of my more stoopid injured-so-I-can't-work stories involved me getting bitten by an alligator. I went in to my boss with 5 out of 10 fingers wrapped in bandages, and explained that I'd try to work (I was doing data entry) but I wasn't gonna be up to speed for a while.

He stared, then said, "Ya know, if it was anyone else I wouldn't believe them.."

[klynn330.livejournal.com]

I used the door chain to lock my door the first night in my apartment and in the morning found that I was locked into my apartment. I had to unscrew the locking mechanism to get out.

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

Ha! That's definitely something I'd do. *hug*

[ultra-lilac.livejournal.com]

An offal truck from the slaughterhouse accidentally dumped its load in the high street.
EVERYONE was late for school/work that day and our mean RE teacher got her car covered in offal.

The village was very stinky for a long time.

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

Ew!

[shala-beads.livejournal.com]

The ball came out of the captured ring I wear in my *censored* and I had a pencil eraser holding the ring in place while I found a new bead. I was working in a job where the pencil eraser would have been noticed.

My husband has to call in Moose occasionally. "I can't come to work yet, there are moose in my driveway." Since occasionally moose attack, nobody's questioned it yet.

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

..!

These are both most excellent (and unique!) reasons.

really happened

[brother-bliss.livejournal.com]

I was held up on my way home because a group of deer would not get out of the middle of the road. The whole herd of ten decived to collect tolls.

My wife yjough I was cheating on her because I was late.

No dear, the deer want to keep us a part.

[brujah.livejournal.com]

A bird flew into my head. Seriously.

[elionwyr.livejournal.com]

This is an AWESOME story!!