elionwyr: (bang)

It's been nearly 4-1/2 years since I started the process of recovering from having a narcissist at the center of my life.  It's as difficult a process as dealing with any sort of abuse, and just as insidious, because people inherently don't want to believe how bad it is for the victim. We as people are an odd mix of beliefs.  We love gossip, and we are often distrusting, but we have a hard time believing someone's truly bad behavior.

It's why gaslighting is so damn easy.  It's why abuse happens.  We see it, and it might even register, but we go into instant denial. It couldn't happen to me.  It can't be that bad.  S/He wouldn't do that.

And then it does.

I just saw this on Facebook, posted on a group page called "Surviving the Narcissist Relationship," and damn I wish I'd seen it in 2009.  I can't say for sure it would have made anything easier - I'm not sure anything would have - but it would have given me a clue stick about what I was going through.  For example, the first time someone told me I was suffering from PTSD, I thought there was no way..no WAY that could be true.

It was.

It's gotten better, and it gets better all the time - which is not to say the gaslighting, lies, and cyberstalking ahs stopped, I'm just better able to handle it - but emotional abuse is something that should never be taken lightly, and a narcissist is a master manipulator as well as abuser.

So.  I am sharing this here. I hope no one reading this needs the information.  But if you do...I hope it helps.
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How to Help Someone Involved With a Narcissist

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February 2017

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